Jack of All Trades, Master of None

I just had the wonderful pleasure of seeing the Tallest Man on Earth perform live.  This is the second time that I’ve been able to see him, and he is one of the best musicians I have ever seen in a live performance.  His albums are incredible, but live he has this energy and charisma that is contagious.  It’s been two days since I’ve seen him and I’m still reeling on the high of his performance.

This post isn’t about him, but he inspired it.  Kristian Matsson was trained as a classical guitarist and it shows in his guitar style.  He’s been playing the guitar for decades, likely.  That is a long time to invest in a single skill, but it has led to wonderful things.  I feel like I am skilled in many areas, but when it comes down to it, I am a jack of all trades, master of none.

Acting

My first passion was acting. I did it for many years.  I was in plays, short films, feature length films, even commercials.  Just as I was getting somewhere, I got burned out.  The people I was with were toxic.  They all loved someone in this tiny, toxic circle of friends.  It was suffocating.  The city I was in had a small independent film scene, and I just wanted out.  I should have continued acting, looking for new people, or even a new town.  But I just wanted out.

Art

Then I went on to art. In all my spare time, I did so much art.  At some points, I had five paintings going on at the same time.  But then I got sick of art shows.  You submit your heart and soul hoping that you get in, then some shit that’s terrible gets accepted over yours.  The worst part is that you pay them money to deny you.  My art, particularly my woodburnings, often took so many hours.  I spent over 40 hours on one piece that was put into an art auction. It sold and I got 50% of the proceeds which was $125.  I made $3.13 an hour to create that piece of art.  For what?

It wasn’t worth it.  I increased the prices on my woodburnings, and people that did like it said that they couldn’t afford it.  I would rather keep my pieces then sell them for shit money. So I stopped doing commissions, and I stopped submitting to art shows.  The urgency was no longer there, and slowly, slowly, slowly, I stopped making as much art.  I still make art, but the hours I spend on it is few and far between.

Sewing

Now I’m sewing.  That’s been slowing down a lot, but I ascribe that mostly to the birth of my son.

Why am I the Jack of all Trades, Master of None?

Now a lot of this has to do with money, or more appropriately, the lack of money as discussed in this post.  I don’t have the time to devote to my art, in any form, because I have to pay bills.  But honestly, I think I just get burned out.  Maybe it’s because I have a full time job and it’s hard to juggle my passions with the logistics of working all day.  So now I have become a jack of all trades, master of none.

Watching the Tallest Man on Earth was inspiring.  He is incredible at what he does.  He is a master.  I long for the flexibility in my free time to become a master.  Isn’t that a conundrum?  Hoping for more free time to become a master.  I think I must go back to art.  I want to be a master of something.  Anything.